i am a big jiggly pathetically sad human being right now.
i wish my mom would go to sleep so i could do it all over again without having to dodge her trips to the kitchen.
Weight: 147 lbs
Dress Size: 8
Highest Weight: 215
Lowest Weight (at height): 145
Goal Weight: 111
Favorite Diet Food: broccoli. lettuce. pineapples.
Favorite Binge Food: ice cream. pizza. mashed potatoes.
Favorite Exercise: dance dance revolution. crosstrainer.
Favorite Thinspo: tiny arms and tummys.
Where Do You Slip Up: anytime i'm home for more than 2 days. i live in a dorm, where everything is perfect.
When Did It Start?:
Hating your body: 2nd grade. age 8
Restricting/counting: 7th grade. age 13 (off and on)
Does Anyone Know: my mom and a lot of people i do not talk to anymore.
You Want Help: i do not need it.
How Many Calories Do You Consume A Day : good day= less than 500. average= 1200-4000
What Do You See When You Look In The Mirror: jello. i jiggle everywhere. thighs stomach arms chin....
Are You In A Relationship: yes
Are You Depressed: not really i just hate everything.
Ever Tried To Commit Suicide: no
Ever Been To A Psychologist: yes
I AM -
[x] living off diet pills
[x] drinking something
 Under 100lbs
 starving yourself
 participating in a fast
 ask if I’m anorexic/bulimic
[x] call me fat
[x] say I’m skinny
[x] say I’m ugly
[x] say I’m pretty
[x] spread rumors about me
[x] force me to eat
[x] say I eat too much
[x] wish I’d eat more
[x] don’t know I’m anorexic/bulimic
I WISH -
[x] I was THIN
[x] I had a better body
[x] I didn’t have to eat
[x] I could control myself
 I was under 110lbs
[x] I could avoid food
[x] I could hide what I am
[x] I wasn’t fat
[x] I was pretty
 I could stop being ana/mia
I LOVE -
[x] feeling hungry
[x] seeing a difference when fasting
[x] being weak
[x] losing weight
[x] being anorexic/bulimic
[x] green tea
[x] diet pills
[x] being able to turn down food
[x] feeling good about myself
 I am shorter than 5’4.
[x] I think I’m ugly sometimes.
[x] I have many scars.
[x] I tan easily.
[x] I wish my hair was a different color.
[x] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[x] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
 I have/had braces.
 I wear glasses
[x] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[x] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
[x] I have more than 2 piercings.
[x] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[x] I have freckles.
[x] I’ve sworn at my parents.
[x] I’ve run away from home.
[x] I’ve been kicked out of the house.
 My biological parents are together.
 I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
 I’ve had children.
 I’ve lost a child.
[x] I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry.
 I’ve peed from laughing.
[x] I’ve snorted while laughing.
[x] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something
[x] I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
 I’ve had my trousers rip in public.
 I’m single
[x] I’m in a relationship.
 I’m engaged.
 I’m married.
 I’ve gone on a blind date.
 I’ve been the dumpee more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[x] I have a fear of abandonment.
[x] I’ve cheated in a relationship.
 I’ve gotten divorced
[x] I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.
[x] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[x] I’ve kept something from a past relationship.
[x] I’ve had a crush on someone of the same sex.
 I’ve had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I am a cuddler.
[x] I’ve been kissed in the rain.
[x] I’ve hugged a stranger.
[x] I have kissed a stranger.
[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve snuck out of my house.
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve cheated on a test.
[x] I’ve been suspended from school.
BAD TIMES -
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol.
 I regularly drink.
 I can’t swallow pills.
[x] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
[x] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression at some point.
[x] I shut others out when I’m upset.
 I take anti-depressants.
[x] I’m anorexic or bulimic or have EDNOS.
[x] I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it.
[x] I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
[x] I’m addicted to self harm.
[x] I’ve woken up crying
[x] I’ve lost weight
[x] I’ve gained weight
[x] My weight holds me back
[x] Weight consumes me.
 I’m at my thinnest
 I’m at my biggest
[x] I’ve lost weight and kept it off
[x] I’ve lost weight but gained it back
[x] My weight affects my mood
[x] I weigh myself daily
[x] I am jealous of everyone smaller than me
 I thrive on compliments
[x] I feel bigger than people who are my size
[x] I feel happy when I’m hungry
[x] I get depressed after I eat
[x] I’ve skipped a meal
[x] I’ve thrown food away
[x] I’ve spit food out
[x] I’ve fasted
[x] I’ve taken diet pills
[x] I’ve used laxatives
[x] I’ve purged
[x] I exercise
[x] I exercise so I can eat
[x] I work out secretly
 I work out daily
[x] I exercise to counteract eating
 I’ve fainted from exhaustion
I’VE DONE -
[x] Diet pills
[x] Pain killers
[x] I keep my eating habits a secret
[x] I have a diet blog
[x] I look at thinspo
[x] I collect thinspo
[x] I’m doing this for me
[x] I’m doing this for someone
[x] I’m doing this to prove myself im strong