Thursday, April 16, 2009


its been too long. i need to keep blogging so i can stay strong. ive been really weak.
but i have gotten down 22 pounds since the beginning of the year!!!!
but i just binged like sooooooooooooooooo bad, and prom is two days away :( im doomed.
and i cant fast all day tomorrow because my boyfriend is taking me out and hes always hungry :(

but, after prom, im fasting for five days, no matter what.
i have to. i have to make up for this week. this whole two weeks have been crazy.
i can finally fit a size ten! im 180 pounds! i havent been this size since sixth grade. :DD
and i want to lose twenty more before school lets out for summer, in less than two months.
and hopefully fifteen more by the end of summer. my goal weight is 140 pounds.
i honestly do not remember ever being that little.
ive been chubby, fat gross all my life.
ive battled this body all my life, gone through periods of not eating for weeks, and then back down to rock bottom again.
and now, its going to change.

i just took three akavar pills, one metabolife, and three laxatives.
i hope its not too late.
but in case it is, im off to go workout and do some yoga.