autopilot

yep.
for the past three weeks ive been on auto and for no reason at all, my plane crashed today, due to lack of fuel.
so, in other words, the depression i thought i had control of, actually was just being pushed inside, while i walk around on cruise control.
but the good news is i went to they gym finally yesterday.
but the bad news is i weigh 162 :(
but the good news is i havent eaten anything solid in over 3 days.
and im going to the gym tomorrow with two friends.
but ill definitely get there way before they do, and im not leaving until after they leave.

im so tired of being fat and sad and empty inside.
im even too depressed to get high.
that doesnt make any fucking sense.
ugh